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November 9th, 2019

tielan: Jyn Erso looking pensive (Rogue One - pensive Jyn)
Saturday, November 9th, 2019 06:57 am
A number of years ago, I remember reading a story on FB - one of those copies-of-a-copy things.

The story was about the neighbours of the poster, who watched next door's mom drag the Christmas tree and decorations out in a fury and put it in the trash can, then storm back inside. A little while later, the kids came out and dragged the Christmas tree out of the trash, arguing about 'who broke mom'.

IIRC, the poster found it funny. So did lots of other people.

But lots of people also responded like the mom had put cigarette butts out on the kids' wrists. It was abusive! It was cruel! What kind of mom would do that?

I thought it was funny myself - like, "wow, what did the kids do that was so bad that mom resorted to this", but a friend waxed lyrical about how taking away Christmas was a terrible thing to do to the children for anything they'd done.

Slowly, talking to her and going through the comments, I teased out that what we (all the people commenting on the post) were responding to was how secure we felt about our parents' justice.

If we trusted our parents to be fair and loving, then the mom's reaction was amusing, because obviously the kids had done something TERRIBLE. But if our experience of parental justice was whimsical and volatile, then the mom's reaction was overwrought and excessive.