April 2025

S M T W T F S
  1234 5
678 9101112
13141516 171819
20212223242526
27282930   

Page Summary

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Sunday, April 27th, 2025 04:13 am
Late in May as the light lengthens
toward summer the young goldfinches
flutter down through the day for the first time
to find themselves among fallen petals
cradling their day's colors in the day's shadows
of the garden beside the old house
after a cold spring with no rain
not a sound comes from the empty village
as I stand eating the black cherries
from the loaded branches above me
saying to myself Remember this


*******


Link
Saturday, April 26th, 2025 04:05 am
Clicky!

Also, I meant to say re: the utilities that you are all the best and I absolutely love you :)

(Still need to call National Grid and still don't wanna.)
Tuesday, April 22nd, 2025 10:34 pm
something happened today that i wanted to share and now i don't remember what it was. it's spring? but you knew that. i don't have an apartment yet, but you knew that too. i do however have a lot of leftover passover food. i have an entire unopened box of egg matzo. i should buy chocolate chips and make matzo crack.

we got new desk chairs at work and they are COM. FY. my back feels so supported.

My heart of silk
is filled with lights,
with lost bells,
with lilies and bees.
I will go very far,
farther than those hills,
farther than the seas,
close to the stars

--Federico García Lorca, from "Ballad of the Small Plaza"
Tuesday, April 22nd, 2025 10:12 pm
I was feeling nostalgic, so I pulled up Road Not Taken and played it for a little while earlier. It took a bit to get back into the swing of things, but I started to remember some of the hidden details and combinations after a while.

It's been ages since the last time I played, and I'd forgotten just how much I love it. It's so helpful if I want to turn off my brain for a little while. I can't believe it's been over a decade since it was first released.
Tuesday, April 22nd, 2025 08:52 pm
*\o/* Word Count Step Count Headache?
Daily 254 8,303 no
Monthly 9,554 217,636 5 days
Tags:
Tuesday, April 22nd, 2025 01:38 am
first, rip, pope francis. i always kinda liked him and thought he was reasonably progressive, for a pope. he legitimately always seemed like a genuinely decent guy.

second, pete hegseth was caught sharing classified military information in yet another signal chat, this time with his wife and his brother (among other people). because he is a dumbass who has no idea how to do his job. and! kristi noem, the head of homeland security, had her purse stolen at a restaurant - very secure there, ms noem - and said purse had inside it such things as her apartment keys (makes sense), her makeup bag (also makes sense), her passport (could conceivably make sense), and, er, $3000. in cash. which seems like the kind of money you carry around if you want to make a big purchase that you don't want anyone to be able to track. my question is: how did someone get close enough to her purse to steal it? she has secret service with her. we really are living in the stupidest timeline, seriously.

in happier news, i had today off on account of patriots day, which is marathon monday and also celebrates the battle of lexington which kicked off the revolutionary war. (reenactors gather on lexington green at ass o'clock in the morning to reenact the battle which i think is both really cool and kinda nuts.) the only states that celebrate are mass and maine. and it was mostly a nice day, even! i got a late start (partly because [livejournal.com profile] tamalinn called me before i could bestir myself out of the house, and then i had to tell her about sinners and try to figure out what besides black panther michael b jordan was in that she might have seen) and went to the diesel and had breakfast for lunch and wrote a bunch, most of it for a random thing that i don't know what to do with. i had to exorcise a scene out of my head, i guess. but it was productive! which is always good.

Yesterday it was still January and I drove home
and the roads were wet and the fields were wet
and a palette knife

had spread a slab of dark blue forestry across the hill.
A splashed white van appeared from a side road
then turned off and I drove on into the drab morning

which was mudded and plain and there was a kind of weary happiness
that nothing was trying to be anything much and nothing
was being suggested. I don’t know how else to explain

the calm of this grey wetness with hardly a glimmer of light or life,
only my car tyres swishing the lying water,
and the crows balanced and rocking on the windy lines.

--Kerry Hardie, "Acceptance"
Monday, April 21st, 2025 09:30 pm
*\o/* Word Count Step Count Headache?
Daily 383 8,148 no
Monthly 9,191 209,157 5 days
Tags:
Tuesday, April 22nd, 2025 12:00 am
After a long day of classes (on a bank holiday, too) I treated myself to some grapefruit + nougat ice cream and then planned to spend some time reading, do some housekeeping in preparation for hosting a guest (very exciting), and then write some overdue review posts, maybe prepare some recs if I'm feeling ambitious.

Instead I spent most of the evening continuing to play Astalon: Tears of the Earth. I'd seen it recommended quite a few times on r/metroidvania and I was very curious, so when I saw it was on sale I bought it even though it's not entirely smart to start a new game 2.5 weeks before an exam. Ah well.

You play as a group of three adventurers in a post-apocalyptic wasteland that investigate (read: fight their way through) a tower from which comes a substance poisoning their village. One of them sold his soul to the titan of death, and in exchange every time you die you are transported back to the entrance of the tower.

I also saw it described as a "metroidvania with roguelite elements," which made me a bit skeptical because the other game that claims that is Dead Cells and that didn't convince me when I briefly tried it. But that description isn't really accurate because it doesn't have the procedural generation of a roguelike, it has the exploration of a metroidvania, and that's my favorite part of the genre. It just doesn't have checkpoints and very little healing. But there's plenty of shortcuts to unlock so landing back at the beginning is much less frustrating than I'd feared. And unlocking shortcuts is very satisfying; the exploration is satisfying in general, with plenty of secrets to discover. Plus, there are not that many but enough character interactions that I care about the characters as well.

After about eight hours I've beaten three bosses (one of them I'm pretty sure is optional) and discovered around 35% of the map. Spoilers )
Tags:
Monday, April 21st, 2025 09:05 pm
Happy cheap chocolate day!

I am a sadly lil llama after yesterday's tennis finals. Ben Shelton was in the Munich final and Carlos Alcaraz was in the Barcelona final - and they both lost 😭 Even worse they both lost to players I Do Not Like 😂

It was also the last year that David Ferrer is the Tournament Director at the Barcelona Open. I was thoroughly enjoying the Ferru spotting all week, not gonna lie.

The one very excellent tennis thing from the last week, however, is that we're getting closer to the end of Jannik Sinner's suspension. He's now allowed to practice tennis again, play on an ATP affiliated court, play with ATP players and work with his coaches. He's spent the last few weeks in the gym with Marco, his fitness trainer and... yeah, Marco's been working that boy hard. He is looking fine. Jannik's been training with Jack Draper last week - OMG so many people ship them and I do not get it but I'm glad they're happy. Me? I'm happy about the fact that him being able to work with his coaches = pictures and videos including Darren and Simone. (Mind, there was also Darren and Simone spotting in Monte Carlo the other week as well which made me all 😻)

This week is the Madrid Masters (and I hadn't realised Feli Lopez was the TD - between him and Ferru, especially with Juanki as Carlitos' coach) it's like a resurgence of the 00s Spanish Armada and I am here for it!)

Is it just me or is this a very ADHD coded post thus far with all the parenthesis?

Lets see... what else?
I spent most of yesterday refreshing my social media profiles (except, apparently, this one. huh. I should look at that). But I'm super pleased at how things now look at [tumblr.com profile] tennisdadsaficionado, [instagram.com profile] bibliollama, (and https://www.threads.net/@bibliollama), and [twitter.com profile] tennisdads
I cooked chicken ramen yesterday and it was so fucking good. I used an Itsu broth carton and Itsu noodles but have a recipe for making my own broth next time
Li made hot cross buns yesterday and they were a little doughy (yeast didn't yeast properly) but super sticky and delicious.

I think that's about it from me, so I shall leave you with my Music Monday offering which, as ever, is my most played track of last week. I had a couple of meltdowns last week and so I comfort played a whole bunch of pop/punk, because that's still such a happy place for me.

And then, of course, leads to many many happy memories of so many gigs and tours following Good Charlotte around the UK on multiple occasions 🧡
Thursday, April 24th, 2025 02:00 pm
and applied for a shitton of jobs. The worst they can do is call me a dipshit, and they probably wouldn't do that to my face. I think? Seems like a waste of time to call somebody up and say "You're terrible, how could you think we'd consider you?"

*****************


Read more... )
Monday, April 21st, 2025 03:04 pm
Hey all, if you'd like to join the crafting hangout, it is tonight from 6-8pm ET!
 
Video encouraged but not required!
 
Topic: Crafting Hangout
Time: Mondays 6:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada)
 
Join Zoom Meeting
 
Meeting ID: 973 2674 2763

Monday, April 21st, 2025 10:30 am
Saturday was a working day with employees here working. It was hot hot hot and sunny. There was a breeze but it only helped so much.

We got half of the required blueberries pulled. Those blueberries are the wrong variety that the nursery sent us and they are mixed into a block that is called the "early riskies". Those are early producing blueberries that taste good. The wrong plants are not early, they are mid to late season and they are mediocre taste. So we got ahold of the nursery and let them know and they are sending replacements this week. But the 4 year old plants need to be pulled out. I put one worker on the tractor (Kubota 7040 orchard tractor. It's tiny but mighty) and I was on the ground. I used a tire strap loop, wrapped around the base of the plant and had him pull the tractor forward, around half of the time, it tightened up and caught on the middle of the bush and pulled it out. I figured out it helped to jam a shovel into the ground a couple of times to loosen the plant up. If it still slipped, I would tighten the strap as tight as possible and cinch it with fencing wire that I had in the back of my truck. that got almost all of the plants. There were a few that still slipped, so those got more shovel stabbing of roots. So one row is down, around 25 plants.

The other employee was doing the thankless job of pulling the dead johnsongrass out of the spartan blueberry rows, so we can get sprays and woodchips down better, so after lunch I switched her to pruning blackberries. We're pretty sure only one variety of blackberries survived the winter, they aren't winter hardy to our temperatures generally, so we lose half of the crop pretty regularly. The problem is that they're the thornless varieties, much less hardy than thorned ones. But I don't know that people will want to pick the thorned ones. Something to work on. There's training the thornless ones onto a folding trellis and stuff, not sure we have the capacity to get it done. I swapped the guy working with me to pulling more johnsongrass and I went and starting moving woodchips.

We are mulching all of the raspberries with woodchips this year, changing it up from straw since the chips are easier. I got the raspberries on this side of the road all mulched this week and now I need to do the spartan blueberries and the raspberries across the road. I got a couple loads dumped that afternoon and then stopped to send the employees off at 4pm, quick chat about schedules for the week and checked the radar. Big storm blob approached, so I wanted to get one more load done. Ran over with the tractor, got it loaded, the sky started sprinking as I headed across the road. Got the load dumped, no problem. As I headed back to the house, I could see the mountains in the distance start to disappear. That's generally bad if you want to stay dry. I crossed the road, parked the tractor, closed my truck bed cover and sprinted to the house because the skies opened up. It was a half hour thunderstorm complete with the power going out briefly.

Everything was soggy after that, so I gave up on working and showered and got ready for the support group. It was decent. Small group and at the beginning the facilitator had made a comment about how the group had been quite large in it's first session in January, but gotten smaller since then, and around halfway through, someone came in late and then I understood why. The person who came in was one of those people who have something to say about everything else other people are talking about and also it was all about her. The facilitator did her best, but I get why a lot of people would have bailed. It was a decent chat though and I'm glad I went. I also got to see the downtown, which I haven't been down there in ages. It looked like there were some decent restaurants and stuff in the area, so I'll have to go and explore.

Yesterday was a lazy day. Dad and I chatted about schedules and plans and since everything was still wet, we couldn't do a ton of stuff. Oh terrible. I got my contribution to easter dinner baked (blueberry fruit bars) and then started working on the rototiller. It's a Howard, which is pretty indestructible which is good because we have a lot of rocks. We take the center tines off to renovate the strawberries and when I want to use it to prep a field, I need to put tines back on. It's a pain. But I like the rototiller for smaller plots. The potatoes still haven't arrived which is baffling, the shipping notice says they haven't given it to USPS yet. So it's somewhere. I'll get the rototilling done today and plant some peas.

Dad and I did a quick scouting and then headed up to the family party. It was a little quieter than some years, but it was a nice time. My cousin made some roasted lamb that was incredible. Lots of mashed potatoes. Yum. I caught up with family and then wandered out to the porch in my socks to watch the volleyball game. After 20 minutes or so, my uncle called me out and said if I was laughing, I should put my mouth where my money is. So I hopped down in my socks and we played valleyball until it got dark. Incredible fun. Ate some more dessert and then headed home and right to bed.

I ran for groceries this morning and also got a library card! Now I've got yogurt on the stove and then rototilling and crafting on the agenda for the rest of the day. Plus laundry.
Monday, April 21st, 2025 09:48 am
Rebellion is growing among Labour MPs, so if you have a Labour MP, now is a VERY good and important time to write to them to protest the proposed PIP and other cuts:

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2025/apr/20/the-whole-policy-is-wrong-rebellion-among-labour-mps-grows-over-5bn-benefits-cut

(If you have a non-Labour MP, hassle them too and see if they can be persuaded to do something vaguely useful.)
Wednesday, April 23rd, 2025 03:51 am
And what if I had simply passed you by,
your false skins gathering light in a basket,
those skins of unpolished copper,
would you have lived more greatly?

Now you are free of that metallic coating,
a broken hull of parchment,
the dried petals of a lily—
those who have not loved you
will not know differently.

But you are green fading into yellow—
how deceptive you have been.

Once I played the cithara,
fingers chafing against each note.
Once I worked the loom,
cast the shuttle through the warp.
Once I scrubbed the tiles
deep in the tub of Alejandro.
Now I try to deciper you.

Beyond the village, within a cloud
of wild cacao and tamarind,
they chant your tale, how you,
most common of your kind,
make the great warrior-men cry
but a woman can unravel you.


****


Link
Tuesday, April 22nd, 2025 12:38 am
Why is she like this.

**************************


Read more... )
Friday, April 18th, 2025 12:29 am
Jenn's plan to self-set-up her own balanced billing + a random screwup with autopay that she didn't realize until we were in the hole + having to help a friend get out of an abusive relationship = omg.

I'm pretty sure that they legally can't actually shut us off until May 15th, and once we get the tax refund we can pay the entire past due bills... but there's no promise we will get that refund by that date, and I would be surprised if we do. I don't want to go a week without lights and hot water, or a fridge and stove.

I'm reasonably certain that if we pay even half the past due now, we can talk them into waiting for that refund. The entire total is something like $6k... I'm a little scared to look again, honestly. I just sorta glanced at the bills in horror.

I've got paypal and venmo, which is posted here, or if you can't see that and can and want to help out you can PM me. We can absolutely pay back (or forward!) as soon as that refund comes in. I know how much the refund is, it will cover these bills.

(I've also been sitting on posting this for a few days, so I better get it out before I chicken out again!)
Sunday, April 20th, 2025 11:57 pm
happy easter to them what celebrate, and to them what don't a lovely and restful sunday. today was beautiful like yesterday but a tch colder so after zoom with the fam (during which my sister defended the sixteen comic book boxes under my bed when my mom wondered why i didn't go through them and get rid of some of them), grocery store (which was not crowded because easter), and lunch (i sat on the front porch for like twenty minutes and then went inside because my feet were cold), i put on shoes and a jacket and went Out. and sat in the sun (sort of) and read my book and drank my iced chai and tried vainly to ignore the fact that i should have worn more clothes. but it was SO NICE. i mean, it's spring.

and then i came home and read some more and made dinner (as passover is now over i can eat bread but instead i had, uh, matzo brei which is basically scrambed eggs with farfel) (ok and also a red bean bread i got at h-mart) (i was going to go out for dinner with my sister but did i mention it's easter? and almost everything is closed) and watched an episode of andor s1 with the confab discord in preparation for s2 which starts on TUESDAY. we haven't caught up yet. if you haven't seen andor i highly recommend it. it's kind of harsh but really well done and diego luna is exceptionally cute. also it has stellan skarsgard and he's always worth watching.

On the edge of another blue world
the lake looms like salvation. Over
coffee, my mom and tía speak excitedly

about the vibrant villages along the shore,
how you can only get there by boat
across the lake’s beautiful depths, how

the volcanos stand piously over the water,
how each village is named for one of the twelve
apostles. I ask, with complete sincerity,

if that means one is named for Judas.
The waitress brings our food. My mom
and tía eat slowly with side-eyes and silence.

--Ariel Francisco, "On the Shore of Lake Atitlán, Apparently I Ruined Breakfast"
Sunday, April 20th, 2025 11:22 pm
In tonight's game, the rest under a cut for those who don't care. )

And that's where we left off.
Sunday, April 20th, 2025 08:56 pm
*\o/* Word Count Step Count Headache?
Daily 298 10,874 no
Monthly 8,808 200,788 5 days
Tags:
Sunday, April 20th, 2025 06:59 pm
Sorry, this one lacks all the flavor [personal profile] ilyena_sylph brings to the table, but I just had to get it down on electrons.

Fives Saves the Galaxy (Redux) (2568 words) by Sharpest_Asp
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Star Wars: The Clone Wars [2008] - All Media Types
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: CT-27-5555 | ARC-5555 | Fives, CT-7567 | Rex, Ahsoka Tano
Additional Tags: Time Travel Fix-It, Mando'a Language (Star Wars)
Summary:

A Force Thing shoves Fives to his Commander... right after she faces Vader.



Fives Saves the Galaxy (Redux)

This place was enough to spook Fives right back into feeling like a cadet, once the world stopping spinning counter to his balance, and he could think past the taste of colors from the world going awry.

How in all the galaxies had he gone from covering Echo's six to this place — oh wait. He shook his head to stop the ringing, which worked exactly opposite of the intent, and glanced at the hand not currently holding a blaster.

Damn. This was some kind of hallucination, Force Thing, or he'd cracked his skull when he tried to catch the weird glowing tube. It was in his hand, but it was not glowing, and he was alone.

Completely alone in a hell-scape littered by dust and ash and debris.

A noise like a hunting raptor brought his head up to see a white bird, one he thought he'd seen on other worlds. He tracked its motion and it swooped toward… a person? His helmet let him zoom, and he saw a Togruta, making them the second living thing he'd found in this place, struggling down a path.

Might be dangerous, but Fives needed answers, and this was his only lead so far.

His fast jog in that direction alerted the person, making them stop and turn, though they did not attempt to make it to him or draw weapons. Just as Fives had almost gotten close enough to make out details beyond 'tall' and 'probably a woman', a ship of a configuration he did not recognize at all, adding to the weirdness of the day.

She — definitely feminine curves — tracked the ship, and he thought she looked very resigned at its leaving. Was it someone leaving her behind on purpose? Had that been her ship?

Who was she? Those were lightsaber hilts next to something like a kama, and armor over her chest as well as on her arms and legs. Something about her looked very familiar, and yet alien to him all at once.

"Well. This is not the kind of ghost I am used to seeing from the Force," the woman said once he was in view. "Nice touch, making the armor look right," and he could tell she wasn't talking to him, so much as about him, and… those marks on her cheeks really brought home why she looked familiar.

He didn't much care for the rest of her coloring — washed out, faded, a sure sign of injury — and she was so tall, so mature, but she had to be his Commander!

"Commander Tano?"

"Not in a very long time, but then… you marched far away even before the end."

Fives should not have let those words spill from his mouth, a rejection of the very idea and adding in all the things he felt about this creepy dead world, even as the bird thing came to alight upon her — his commander's! — shoulder. When he stopped blistering the air, he reached up and swiped the helmet off, so she could see him with her eyes, the real him, not just the bucket.

He wasn't sure that was the best idea as her eyes went all white, and he could almost feel the energy in the air around her. Even as he took a step back, the white faded, and she moved to reach for him, only to stumble.

Instinct had him there, steadying her, and he realized she was injured, probably severely from the marks he could see, and how pale she was. He cast about, hunting for shelter, saw a small portal leading into darkness and not much else.

"Help me get there, Fives, and then we can talk," she said softly.

"Sir, yes sir," he breathed, getting his helmet back on as he felt that she had accepted him for who he was, even if all of this was a karking holo-drama with a bad sense of humor.





Fives won the argument of 'first aid then talking', without actually having to insist all that much. He was noticing how much quieter his Commander was and really not liking it at all. Finally, satisfied all of his kit had been exhausted on her injuries, he settled beside her at her insistence.

"Got a droid popper? I need to show you a trick with it," Ahsoka said, making his curiosity light up. He found one, handing it over, then leaned in as she opened a side to recalibrate it. "This frequency, for this duration," she said, making certain he could see the settings.

"Doesn't look like that would penetrate much more than plastoid, let alone work on any droid I know of," Fives told her dubiously. "But yes sir, I won't forget the settings," he added at her very searching look.

"Good. And Fives? I'm sorry." She thumbed the switch then, and Fives felt a piercing pain in his temple, one that felt like fire inside his skull, making him grab for it. What in all of space had she done — no. What had the longnecks done that a droid popper worked like that on him?!

"Back with me, Fives?" the woman that his Commander was in this bad place was asking, every few seconds, it seemed like, or maybe time was just looping in his head.

"Yes, Commander." He brought his face up and met her eyes. "All of us?"

The sadness in her eyes said far too much, and he had to get up, walk away, just walk and move, though he didn't leave the small chamber they had found. He just kept moving.

Ahsoka Tano was an adult with montrals and lekku to rival General Ti's. There were no vod'e on her six, no one with her. She carried herself with precision, contained in the same way that older clones who had been through harrowing losses were.

There was a chip in their heads, and she had not only known about it, but short-circuited it before giving him a sit-rep.

The math was adding up to an ugly story, one he didn't want to hear, but one he knew he had to. Only… was there any good in hearing it, if he was here-now?

"How many died?"

"Too many. Vod'e and Jedi alike," she told him, voice soft and hurting. "I've rescued the ones I could, Fives. But… it doesn't help me deal with the pain anymore than it helps Rex to know he saved me."

At that, Fives came back to her, squatting in front of her, eyes lighting. "The Captain made it?"

"Yes. Him, Wolffe, Gregor — you wouldn't know him. They escaped the initial order that turned the chips on and took all of you from us." She reached out, a slender finger tracing his tat on his forehead. "You made it possible for Rex, but we lost you in that terrible mess. He told me the story, when we were hiding together.

"But now, with you here? Maybe — Maybe the Force can undo it all."

"How?" he asked her. "I mean, I want to. I'll do anything to save my brothers and the Jedi. But… how?"

She smiled. "I tell you a long story, with all of the details I know. Then you go back. I should be able to figure that much out, or the Force wouldn't have brought you to me."

Fives really took stock of her again, seeing a woman whose early confidence was now backed by fire-annealed skills. If she could make the Force do what she wanted it to —

— he wasn't going to argue. Any chance to save his brothers and the Jedi was to be taken.





"Fives?"

Echo's voice was overriding the taste of color and the sound of odors. All that Fives had learned burned in his head, written in a script he couldn't read on scavenged flimsi inside his blacks. He could feel it there, pressing against his skin like the mission he now had.

One way or another, he was going to save them all. He couldn't bear the thought of failure.

"I'm fine," he told his batch-brother, making certain that he hadn't missed any time — the commander had said he should flit right back into the moment the thing had taken him from. "Thought I saw something, but it's gone now." Not quite a lie, which made him feel better. Echo deserved truth, always, but at the same time, he couldn't bog his brother down with the weight of what was coming.

Tarkin was definitely a dead man if they wound up going on that mission, though.

He just kept his eyes focused ahead, working on clearing this sweep mission, as the need to save everyone burned in the back of his mind. He was going to need to win the Captain over, to get him to Wolffe, but Ahsoka had given him enough pieces to know how to do that.

It almost amused him, to know she had never let go of that deep bond with Captain Rex, and he wondered if it had grown to something personal, just to keep himself from going crazy.





While Fives hated bothering the Captain in his off-time, it was also the only way he was going to talk to the man alone. He saw Jesse and Kix were occupied, ruling out the rare comfort the Captain would take with their medic, and headed through the ship until he got to the cabin Rex had conceded was closer to the bridge and offered privacy for counseling soldiers in need.

He was let in to see the Commander — looking short and baby-plump cheeks with short montrals like she ought to — in with the Captain and debated how to go about this. He knew he could not involve their General, but he hadn't been warned about Ahsoka herself.

"Fives," Rex said, sitting on the edge of the berth while Ahsoka sat on the small desk, swinging her feet a little. She was searching Fives' face which felt a little unnerving after being with the older version for several days.

"I wanted to show you something I found out about the droid poppers, sir," Fives began, deciding that the first move in this was an exact copy of the Commander's with him. He settled on the Captain's side, trying not to fumble under those intent looks from Ahsoka Tano, or just the sheer physicality of invading The Captain's space. Rex leaned over when Fives opened the droid popper, and just frowned a little at the reset of the parameters.

"Doesn't look effective for much, from what little I can remember about them," Rex said.

"Only, it will help us, sir, with a persistent problem," Fives told him, before thumbing the switch for immediate use. Just as he'd done, Rex raised a hand to his temple, eyes wincing shut, face in a grimace… and Ahsoka all but teleported herself to Rex's other side, eyes not on the Captain but on Fives, even as she used instinctive Force-healing on the spot paining their captain.

"The nightmare."

Ahsoka's flat voice on those two words made Fives' eyes go wide. He knew she was Commander Vod'ika, considered more one of them than Jedi sometimes, but she knew?! Who had —

She trilled something, a familiar sound that had been used as whistle code among the cadets, a sound that meant comfort and safety and protection.

"I… you… yes, sir. The Nightmare." He set the expended popper down, and got an arm around the Captain's shoulders as Rex was bringing himself under control.

"What. The. Kriff."

"I told you I dreamed about those years again, of seeing all of you, of feeling your worries," Ahsoka said patiently. "Apparently Fives is now a part of whatever it is tying me to all of you in this."

"You don't know the half of it, sir," Fives said fervently.

"Knock off the rank stuff in here, Fives," Ahsoka told him. "I came to talk to Rex about it, he said it started for him on last sleep and he decided to go do target practice, so I wasn't channeling it off of him… which means some of the other first years probably are having it again.

"If you can help us understand, starting with what you just did to Rexter, we can start fixing it."

"The longnecks put a chip in us, to make us perfectly obedient… to the correct orders, when the time came," Fives said quietly, hoping these quarters were shielded enough to keep the General from appearing. The color Ahsoka turned, and the absolute wretched look on Rex's face said they had followed the right thought-paths… and Fives breathed out. "We can stop it.

"Because the Force decided to show me a future. One we're going to send to haran now," Fives said with all confidence.

"Trying to become a jetii now?" Rex said, dark humor flavoring the words, before he looked at Ahsoka, who had not left his side. "General?"

"No," she and Fives answered in one breath, before she tipped her head to Fives.

"He's got the Force-equivalent of the damned chip in his head, because the order can only come from one man," Fives whispered, ready to defend the truth he knew if he had to. "I don't like it, but… I can't disbelieve, not after having the chip fried in my head when I had no idea about it."

Several long minutes passed, and this time it was Rex putting an arm around Ahsoka, letting her turn into his shoulder for comfort, before Fives got to outline what he knew, and the plan that the adult Ahsoka had helped him work out.





The 104th got assigned to a long joint mission with the 501st on the 'front line' furthest from Coruscant. Every emergency designed to pull Anakin Skywalker back to the center of things was diverted by another Jedi or unit. Naboo's Senator was rumored to have two Jedi Sentinels in her bodyguards.

A mysterious headache swept through the Grand Army of the Republic but had no discernible cause. A handful of high-ranking Fleet officers had malfunctions during evac drills. And several Senators suddenly had all of their funds frozen, pending investigation from the Security Council, based on anonymous tips.

Fives never got close to the cause of it all, but the holos of CorSec attempting to arrest the Chancellor on charges of bribery, mismanagement of funds, and inciting riots let he and his brothers see their own people take down a Sith. Too many died… and yet. It was a tiny fraction of the deaths that would be, that had already happened, because two Sith chose to play a dejarik game with the prize being the destruction of the Jedi and the Republic.

Sometimes, after, Fives would swear that he heard that strange bird of the Force, or saw a white light centered on his Commander when there was no explanation for it. He tried to push it away, tried to just be grateful she wouldn't have to be that stately woman carrying the pain of the galaxy on her shoulders.

And no one but she, Rex, and Master Plo Koon had to know he'd had anything to do with unraveling it all, something he was glad of, as Fox and Thire became the Faces of their people for their part in it all. Fives was content to face a new future with Echo at his side.

Sunday, April 20th, 2025 01:59 pm
Reading: Still working my way through The Spear Cuts Through Water--somewhere past the halfway point now.

Watching: I finished my Guardian rewatch!

[personal profile] scruloose and I finished season 1 of Kingdom and did indeed opt to hold off on season 2 until after we finish season 2 of The Last of Us. (Is Kingdom complete at two seasons? Anyone know offhand? Fear of spoilers makes me not want to search up the info.) We also saw the season premiere of TLoU and the first episode of The Pitt.

Playing: Because the evil 368chickens game keeps track and springs the number on you when you beat it, I know that when I finally rescued 368 chickens a few days ago it was after 454 tries. And for reasons that are not clear to me, the victory screen (at least in the browser version) also informs you that you can't play anymore and is all that shows if you reload. (There are ways around it, of course--incognito tabs, simply using a different browser, whatever--but it just seems weird to me. I have thus far avoided going back to it, but that just means returning to my default couple of games that I play endlessly when my brain is completely incapable of focus but needs to be doing something. >.<)

Adulting: Mid-week, [personal profile] scruloose and I took the day off for my birthday and both dropped off our tax documents with our tax guy (bless our tax guy) and voted in the federal election at the Elections Canada office. I'm glad we got the voting taken care of so early--sounds like lineups for advance polls have been unusually lengthy this weekend (and here's hoping that's a good sign for the outcome!).
under the cut: fruit and meat consumption (separately) )
Monday, April 21st, 2025 11:16 pm
That's insane for NYC April, right?

**************************


Read more... )
Saturday, April 19th, 2025 11:20 pm
today was beautiful (warm, mostly sunny, nice breeze) and i celebrated by a. going to the dentist (all good), b. meeting friend l and [livejournal.com profile] tamalinn for a snack and a walk (we saw small turtles and large fish, and there was a goose watching us), and c. watching sinners with michael b jordan (playing twins!), hailee steinfeld, and delroy lindo. ok, and a bunch of other actors but those are the names i know. it was billed as horror. ) the story is that the twins come home to mississippi from chicago in 1932 and open a juke joint and discover evil afoot, and there's a scene during the joint's opening night that is fantastic, and overall i enjoyed it and i'm glad i went to see it. the only thing i think i'd change is that i went at four when it was still nice out and maybe i could've gone to the five o'clock show instead.

(previews were the next and i think last mission impossible, another final destination, and one battle after another with leonardo dicaprio which looks really interesting. and i sat a couple rows too close to the screen. >.< )

the james webb space telescope might have discovered signs of life on another planet. could be really cool, could be not as big a deal as we think. we'll see!

may the fourth (meal box) be with you! by which i mean, clover (my favorite local chain) is doing a star wars inspired meal box for may fourth. it includes green pancake mix (for making baby yoda pancakes, natch) and blue milk and bantha gyros, among other things.

"When Benny Agbayani Became a Met"

my ancestors rose and cheered.
From their ancient graves,

pairs of arms rose to make the wave.
Every burial site, a stadium and,

for every one of his at-bats
Mayon Volcano spat a puff of smoke

visible for miles. Children in T-shirts
with the number 50, hand-scrawled by Sharpies

would run into the streets and clang
on metal pans calling all to feast

and when Benny’s cleats dug into the box,
the little cloud of dust rising from his spikes

would drift across continents, into the living room
of every Filipino, issuing a sneeze

which would be followed by a blessing.
The diaspora, a flood of blessings,

watching the orange, blue, and white uniforms
pixelated into millions of screens.

Tens of thousands of nurses held their breaths
when they looked up between shifts

and saw him rest the bat on his shoulder
staring down the pitcher. When Benny Agbayani

was a Met, whole families, once torn apart
by distance held each other close, wrapped

together tightly in the embrace of phone cords,
the web of telephone lines crisscrossing the nation.

Each long distance call the shimmering pulse of a wrist
bracing for the recoil of the bat making contact.

When Benny fielded fly balls we’d all look
into the sun for the speck of something—

something to ease us into the heartbeat
of Americana where it was always

summer and the lawn markings
formed grids visible from space.

When Benny Agbayani was a Met we thought
the organ’s roar was for us and the syncopated applause

put us into a rhythm in tune to our hearts.
When Benny Agbayani put his mitt to the ground

to stop a daisy cutter, millions of us put our ears
to the earth to hear the rumblings

of what we hoped would be thousands of footsteps,
following his path. But instead they were galloping

towards home. We’d raise the brim of our caps
and nod our chins at a cool breeze

or the smell of fryer oil. And when Shea
sang in one voice “B-B-B-Benny and the Mets”

we stood and put are hands to our hearts.
We rocked back and forth on our heels

watching the strike zone get smaller
and smaller. Watched as the sun made

our shadows grow and we waited until the roster
made room for us in the show, now and in the ever after.

--Oliver de la Paz
Sunday, April 20th, 2025 12:29 pm
Third From the End (1029 words) by anr
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Christine Chapel/Leonard "Bones" McCoy
Characters: Christine Chapel, Leonard "Bones" McCoy
Additional Tags: 5 Times, Touch
Summary: When his fingers catch hers and hold, she smiles and doesn't pull away.
(aka, Five times McCoy and Chapel touch.)

Sunday, April 20th, 2025 12:13 pm
I went to a comedy show last night. Currently in Australia, but it's usually in the UK. If you're reading my blog, you'd probably enjoy it.

It's called BUFFY REVAMPED. And what happens is, Spike stands on stage for an hour, telling everyone the plot of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. It's hilarious.

Highlights include:
- Songs from the perspective of Buffy, Faith, and Xander (all performed by Spike wearing appropriate bits of costume)
- An overhead projector presentation about the Initiative
- Season 5 told mainly through poems by William the Bloody

He described Dawn as being "like a new board game, or a Christopher Nolan film; not shit, but you need time to get used to it".


It's fun! Go see it!
Saturday, April 19th, 2025 09:11 pm
Post card from [personal profile] kalloway! Thank you!

*\o/* Word Count Step Count Headache?
Daily 772 8,601 no
Monthly 8,510 189,547 5 days