Jan Talkmeme - tropes I wouldn't

[tielan]

beatrice_otter: Plot bunny/trope that you would never write, and why.

I was going to say that there's nothing I wouldn't write if I was given the right bunny, but I think that I can say, with reasonable safety, that mpreg probably qualifies. Never done it, and I won't say I never will, but I doubt it. For starters, taking something essentially female and giving it to a guy? Takes the focus away from the woman. Which is not my thing. It is, in fact, the anti-my-thing. And while I do occasionally find characters slashable, it's very specific characters and pairings, and I'm not usually that into writing them having a child.

Also: as a single woman with no urgent desire to be a mother (I'm not childfree, but I'm not missing something, the way 'childless' tends to imply) and a low likelihood that I even could if I found someone tomorrow, there's a part of me that rebels at the idea that having a child is SPESHUL. That the process of birth somehow elevates you and your partner's relationship to something better, more intimate, unbreakable. As so many people on and off my flist can attest from the example of their own parents; having children doesn't make you a better person - it just makes you a parent.

So no mpreg; if I was going to write about a same-sex couple having children, it would be adoption or surrogacy - the whole emotional ups and downs of such a process, the strains and struggles, the hanging questions and the unwanted answers. To me, that would be the interesting part of such a story, not the 'we gave birth it's the miracle of life and proof of our enduring everlasting love!' angle.

Comments

[muccamukk]

I wrote it once for a fic fest pinch hit, and it was fun.

I think the main thing I've found in its favour is that it largely replaced several disposable women tropes that I liked less. I don't mind giving pregnancy to guys (they can have it!), and am a lot less fond of women dies and leaves them baby, or woman is evil and they take baby, which were popular alternatives in the '90s when writers wanted Surprise!Baby fic, and had a wonderful woman only there for her womb vibe.

That said, the strains and struggles of adoption (Paperwork! OMG!) or other options are certainly more interesting. I do still like the surprise!baby angle, because watching fictional people struggle with extremely large amounts of stress for which they are in no way emotionally prepared makes me happy.

Entirely unfond of all mystical birth experiences, or genetic children = true love themes.

[beatrice_otter]

"we gave birth it's the miracle of life and proof of our enduring everlasting love!"

I've seen very little kidfic or pregnancy fic--mpreg or fpreg--with that as the theme. And when I do, it's usually a het fpreg. And not the theme of the fic, more like the finishing touch on a fluffy romance fic. Mpreg tends to be more about angst--OH SHIT I'M PREGNANT, WHAT NOW?!? Which, when I want kidfic, is usually what I'm after--the complications, the realization that this isn't happily-ever-after, this is hard and complicated and can be rewarding but is still not for the faint of heart. But I totally get what you mean about taking female stuff and giving it to a guy.

[retsuko]

I struggle with this trope and don't read it much; I didn't enjoy being pregnant and don't really want to revisit it, even in fic form. It's not a squick or trigger, just a sort of general ambivalence. But that said, there are days when I think about it and I wish it could work, because it would so massively throw gender norms under the bus and that would be delightful to read about. Those days are the 1%, though, and most of the time I'm generally against it for the reasons you describe.