links

[tielan]

Kate Harding: The fantasy of being Thin (2007)

Thoughts on 'thin'ness as an aspirational shorthand.


Suleika Snyder: Born To Be White: How Biracial Historical Heroes Reinforce The Status Quo (2018)


From Women and Alcohol: The Silent Addiction Killing A Generation of Australian Women

thoughts

While seeing the new doc, he asked me several questions around drinking:
- how often do I drink?
- how much do I drink in a sitting?
- do I think this is too much drinking?

I was kind of surprised at the last question – the first two are standard. But the third one gave me a split-second’s pause. “Do I think that how often and how much I drink is too much?” Well, no. I mean, I might drink once or twice a week, but it’s always only one standard glass (or a nip). If I’m out with friends for a celebration, then I might have two over four-five hours, maybe three, depending on the cocktail size.

Shortly after (as in, a couple of days), I somehow clicked myself around to an instagram account called tellbetterstories, which talked about the subtle (and not-so-subtle) ‘advertising’ of drinking as a medication for being a busy woman. All those pics of alcohol as a lifestyle choice, glamourous drinking, wine as a panacea for the struggle of being a full-time worker + mother/manager + domestic goddess.

The account was started by a woman who’s in sober recovery, but also wants other people to think about their relationship with alcohol, and possibly also how they portray it in social media. Which is fair. When I go out and have a nice dinner or cocktail, I post a pic of it on instagram – a pretty, glamorous shot of ‘a good time’. That said, I’m just as likely to post home-cooked food without a drink in sight, or my morning coffee, or a really good pot of chai. Social media ‘branding’, as they call it.

I think it’s worth thinking about, though – about drinking and drinking culture. This Friday there’s a night out with the hockey club at our local club – it’ll probably end up a night of pretty hard drinking for some of the women. I’ll have a glass with dinner, maybe a second one with some cake, and if I have a third, I’ll either drive home or catch the courtesy bus they offer to patrons who live in a 5km radius. I’ll probably have a glass on Saturday when I’m at the pub with the ‘old’ ladies quilting group. I might have a glass on Sunday if the hockey team goes for dinner after our game.

An American friend living in Australia once said that Australians had a casual drinking problem. But she doesn’t drink, and she can be judgemental when it comes to her choices vs other people’s, so I was a bit put off by that statement. If this was what she’s talking about – the normalisation of getting quietly drunk – then, yeah, it’s a problem that’s becoming larger. But the solution to ‘the drinking problem’ isn’t just to dry out, anymore than the solution to ‘being fat’ is to just stop eating.

Why are women drinking more? Because they’re coping less. And that’s a whole other issue to unpack.


recipes:
Brazilian Cheese Puffs
Marinated Skirt Steak

Quartzy: Why Men Are So Bad At Friendship: (hint: it’s not biology)

Democracy Journal: The liberal order isn't coming back, what next?

Why should we expect that a system established more than 70 years ago based on a particular distribution of power and array of threats should have the same effectiveness now?

Democracy Journal: Middle America Reboots Democracy:

At the current pace, it seems likely that the pop-up leaders and grassroots groups of 2017 will, by 2019, have repopulated the local layer of the Democratic Party in much of the country. National media misperceptions to the contrary, this will not look like a far-left reinvention of Tea Partiers or a continuation of Bernie 2016. It will look like retired librarians rolling their eyes at the present state of affairs, and then taking charge.

I have a slight cynicism about this: the local movement, so it's implied, is largely white suburban women, and I don't know how much of it is "see, white people can be for democracy without racism!!!!"


Population shock: world population statistics: I was looking up the world population back in the 1940s, and only just realised that between then and 1990 the population of the world DOUBLED. And at the rate we’re going, it’ll have doubled AGAIN by 2050.

...that's a lot of people.

Comments

[ladyjax]

I think this is a good companion to that Middle America democracy piece:

Block by BLOC: Wisconsin Black Women prove the simple truth about how the Democrats have failed

Because I still am salty as hell about how Black were blamed for Hillary losing even though the numbers ultimately said different coupled with please for "unity" when folks are messy.

[tielan]

Yeah, black people voted overwhelmingly for Hillary where they could, and where they weren't blocked by voting booth racism. White people in vast majorities DID NOT.

And that link is a good thing to read about - and absolutely correct. No point in 'being there' election year if you're not there the rest of the time, and it sounds like BLOC is doing the hard yards.

[rmc28]

I don't think that a glass or two of wine in an evening is exactly hard-drinking. Part of it is the difference between "mellow" and "drunk" - I know a lot of people who drink enough to relax without getting full-on drunk and out-of-control.

(I barely drink at all these days because my tolerance is low, which is a self-fulfilling circle.)

[tielan]

I think it's less about being out of control, and more about the glamourisation of drinking alcohol as a lifestyle, a harmless accessory/necessity in a woman's life, and the social encouragement to drink - like "Rosé All Day". For some, it's easy to slide from one glass with dinner to two, to a glass with lunch, to a glass by 10am...

I've never drunk much either, except for a couple of years at uni, although for me, it helps that a) my skin goes red and a little splotchy - vanity is an amazing inhibitor - and b) I fall asleep which effectively ends my drinking.

[monanotlisa]

I don't even think it's a glamorization, necessarily -- but I don't watch any non-genre media. I think more lifestyle and drama - oriented television and movies do feature what you speak of.

What transcends the different categories, though, is the persistence of drinking, or the use as a sleeping aid. I love Fringe, for example, and I love that Olivia drinks Whiskey...but man, if you're a hard-working government agent, you really can't get up the next morning and look as good as she does. I've noticed a lot of alcohol in Killjoys (no wonder; their headquarters are basically a bar ;) and Dark Matter too. But my point is, the next morning they're all fine and dandy. And that's not likely at all.

As someone who loves wine and occasionally drinks beer or a cocktail, I don't think the depiction of alcohol usage needs to be edited as much as the aftermath. Doesn't have to be an afterschool special -- just a depiction of how it impairs you, and how bad you feel. (By comparison, some media DOES feature hangovers etc. and always feels more realistic and layered for it.)

[glass_icarus]

Thanks for the links! (Also/especially PAO DE QUEIJO!!!! I love that bread SO much omg. xD)