death in the family

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My uncle - eldest son on the paternal side - died yesterday.

it was apparently fast

although they don't know why. An autopsy is being done. He and his wife were social in their local circles, but not close to the rest of the family. They had no kids.

I've spoke about Uncle H before. Introverted, autistic, a kind, quiet man, scarred by his exacting father - my grandfather, who I only remember positively, but accept that he was a Bad Parent for Uncle.

Anyway, this leaves his wife alone and solo, don't know how she's going to do. She's got good family close, and apparently good neighbours too, but for the last six or seven years, she and Uncle H have very heavily relied on each other.

She wants a very private funeral, and it's entirely possible we won't be invited. I'm okay with whatever makes her life easier, which includes not being invited to the funeral. I don't need the funeral, I have the memories of Uncle H, his faithfulness, his introverted quirks. I'll keep up with Aunty SH - check in with her every couple of weeks - and pray for her health and care. But I'm not bothered about the funeral - that's for the living, if they need it, and I don't for Uncle H.

Just got off the phone with my dad, who is still in processing mode. I called my aunt (Uncle H's younger sister) this morning because Uncle H's wife didn't have their numbers (and possibly didn't want to deal with Dad and Aunty H, both of whom can be tricky to deal with.

Anyway, I think I talked him down from trying to come over straight away. Wait and see if Aunty SH tells him when the funeral/interral is, and if not, then we'll arrange a date to come, meet at the graveside and have a short memorial of family. It's no biggie, to me.

--

Also, the deed is done, re: Gladys the chicken.