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on the politics of possession by ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
glass_icarus: A crystal-sharp piece about Americanness, and how she, an American citizen of Chinese appearance and descent, will never be allowed to own the term 'American' - not unchallenged.
If my experience isn't anywhere near as painful as hers, it still has barbs.
I was born here. This is my country, my culture. I have no 'back home' to go to other than Australia. And yet, far and away the majority of people ask me, "So where do you come from?" And the answer of "Sydney, Australia" is not good enough. Oh, a few people see the pit they're at the brink of walking into and stop. But most people just plunge on.
But they're just interested in your background!
Maybe so, but it's my background. What if I don't want to share it? What if I want to be taken for who I am in the here and now, and not for my ancestry? What if I'm not comfortable with justifying my being here in Australia aschiroho or sharim or arabel or b36 will never have to? Or should my comfort zones be sacrificed for the right of the nice white person to know my citizenship and ancestry status to satisfy their curiosity?
And this is I, who was born in Sydney, grew up in Sydney, moved to Wollongong for eight years, and came back to Sydney. I speak Australian. I'm educated and middle-class. My parents have degrees. Both my father and stepfather were born here. My grandparents lived out here from the sixties onwards - in my paternal grandparents' case, they came here just after WWII.
I'm not even an immigrant!
And then it all becomes spectacularly ironic when you add in the cry for immigrants to 'become Australian'. (Whatever that means. Should they renounce their faith? Agree not to wear headscarves? Avoid fasting and feasting? Must they learn English and recite cricket stats? Drink Victoria Bitter and guzzle a meat pie? What does it mean to be Australian, anyway?)
They should become Australian, eh?
So how 'Australian' can they feel when the question of "So, where are you from?" comes up and "[Australian city]" is not an acceptable answer? When their citizenship is questioned - over and over again, with every new person they meet?
I'm one of the lucky ones as it goes. I don't have that cultural conflict pulling at me. I know my rights as an Australian born and Australian bred citizen. Someone trying to tell me to go 'back' to China will get an earful and a half. Nobody with half a brain cell would even try.
Still, I doubt I'll ever be allowed to 'own' my Australianness completely. Someone will always question my ancestry as they'd never question, say,sharim's.
The truth is that our broader cultural understanding of 'Australian' really means 'white Australian' - and I'll never pass as white.
ETA: This isn't a 'sympathy' post. I don't want you to feel sorry for me or pat me on the back. I'd rather you thought about what I'm saying and whether you've been in the position of putting someone in the spot for not being what you expect of [insert nationality here]. If you haven't, would you intervene for someone else who is being put on the spot, but who couldn't express the conflicts within them? Would you challenge someone else's expectations of what it means to be of your citizenship? Or is someone else's trouble none of your business, none of your problem? This isn't about me-and-my-pain; it's about people-like-me-and-their-struggle-for-acceptance and how I/we can respect them and their boundaries in future.
glass_icarus: A crystal-sharp piece about Americanness, and how she, an American citizen of Chinese appearance and descent, will never be allowed to own the term 'American' - not unchallenged.If my experience isn't anywhere near as painful as hers, it still has barbs.
I was born here. This is my country, my culture. I have no 'back home' to go to other than Australia. And yet, far and away the majority of people ask me, "So where do you come from?" And the answer of "Sydney, Australia" is not good enough. Oh, a few people see the pit they're at the brink of walking into and stop. But most people just plunge on.
But they're just interested in your background!
Maybe so, but it's my background. What if I don't want to share it? What if I want to be taken for who I am in the here and now, and not for my ancestry? What if I'm not comfortable with justifying my being here in Australia as
chiroho or sharim or arabel or b36 will never have to? Or should my comfort zones be sacrificed for the right of the nice white person to know my citizenship and ancestry status to satisfy their curiosity?And this is I, who was born in Sydney, grew up in Sydney, moved to Wollongong for eight years, and came back to Sydney. I speak Australian. I'm educated and middle-class. My parents have degrees. Both my father and stepfather were born here. My grandparents lived out here from the sixties onwards - in my paternal grandparents' case, they came here just after WWII.
I'm not even an immigrant!
And then it all becomes spectacularly ironic when you add in the cry for immigrants to 'become Australian'. (Whatever that means. Should they renounce their faith? Agree not to wear headscarves? Avoid fasting and feasting? Must they learn English and recite cricket stats? Drink Victoria Bitter and guzzle a meat pie? What does it mean to be Australian, anyway?)
They should become Australian, eh?
So how 'Australian' can they feel when the question of "So, where are you from?" comes up and "[Australian city]" is not an acceptable answer? When their citizenship is questioned - over and over again, with every new person they meet?
I'm one of the lucky ones as it goes. I don't have that cultural conflict pulling at me. I know my rights as an Australian born and Australian bred citizen. Someone trying to tell me to go 'back' to China will get an earful and a half. Nobody with half a brain cell would even try.
Still, I doubt I'll ever be allowed to 'own' my Australianness completely. Someone will always question my ancestry as they'd never question, say,
sharim's.The truth is that our broader cultural understanding of 'Australian' really means 'white Australian' - and I'll never pass as white.
ETA: This isn't a 'sympathy' post. I don't want you to feel sorry for me or pat me on the back. I'd rather you thought about what I'm saying and whether you've been in the position of putting someone in the spot for not being what you expect of [insert nationality here]. If you haven't, would you intervene for someone else who is being put on the spot, but who couldn't express the conflicts within them? Would you challenge someone else's expectations of what it means to be of your citizenship? Or is someone else's trouble none of your business, none of your problem? This isn't about me-and-my-pain; it's about people-like-me-and-their-struggle-for-acceptance and how I/we can respect them and their boundaries in future.
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