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I'm seeing the endodontist next week about the old root canal that's failing.
Root canals and I have not been friendly lately, so there's a part of me that's wondering if this is the start of another merry-go-round of physical issues - jaw aches and tingling and swelling and exhaustion and depression.
I didn't write very much in February at all, thanks to pain and general health issues because of the root canal and all the side effects, and have only gotten back into the swing of things during April. Except that I feel like I'm hovering on the precipice of another slide, and I'm not as healthy as I was the last time this happened.
There's the current spine issues (sandy/gravelly noises at the join of the spine/skull), which may be causing the marginally swollen right hand and right foot, and the twinges I've been feeling up and down the right side and which I'm now wondering if I'm feeling on the left side.
There's the sleep patterns - I was waking up between 3am and 4:30am and then having trouble getting back to sleep for a while. I've managed to extend it to 5:30am before I wake up, and then it's just a question of lying there for an hour before going to work.
And then, next week, we're back to the teeth again.
The 16 molar has sort of settled; like I said, the gum beneath the tooth feels slightly squishy. The 17 is the one that the endodontist is going to look at on Monday - the one with the chronic infection above it at the jaw. And I'm not looking forward to the needles and the numbness and the swelling and the 'settling' that has to happen - assuming the 17 molar can even be redone.
And I'm nervous. I'm nervous about the procedure, given how much trouble I've had. I'm nervous about the issues I'm having which have affected my activity and my mentality and made me feel awfully like a hypochondriac - like I'm starting at shadows all the time.
And I'm nervous about my writing.
I've been doing a lot of writing this month, but the big two that I really want to finish - a practical acquaintance with bees and Sokovia, Suburbia, and the Senate - are waiting for Civil War, just to see where the characterisation/story goes. Both are very much going to be jossed, but a practical acquaintance should be okay, because it was never going to stick to the score after Cap2 anyway. Mostly I want more Bucky characterisation for that, which Civil War should give us as The Winter Soldier didn't.
Sokovia, Suburbia, et. al is a different kettle of fish, mostly because it's a Civil War aftermath fic that doesn't follow the movies. And that confuses people a great deal, particularly after movies come out and are not what people predicted they'd be.
Plus, I was having trouble with the next section anyway (rewrote it about 5 times, summarised it, detailed it, deleted it again, rewrote it another 5 times, and Steve is still not playing ball with the story). I think I'm going to have to recalibrate that section entirely, start somewhere else, and introduce the next set of characters, backstorying the parts that I was trying to write. Ugh.
But all this depends on me having the energy/inspiration to actually write.
Let's not even go near the subject of profic and my upcoming 40th birthday. I haven't written any profic in a couple of years - too much second-guessing myself.
Speaking of my 40th; I need to have a word with the parentals about the party they want to throw me when I get back from overseas...
Root canals and I have not been friendly lately, so there's a part of me that's wondering if this is the start of another merry-go-round of physical issues - jaw aches and tingling and swelling and exhaustion and depression.
I didn't write very much in February at all, thanks to pain and general health issues because of the root canal and all the side effects, and have only gotten back into the swing of things during April. Except that I feel like I'm hovering on the precipice of another slide, and I'm not as healthy as I was the last time this happened.
There's the current spine issues (sandy/gravelly noises at the join of the spine/skull), which may be causing the marginally swollen right hand and right foot, and the twinges I've been feeling up and down the right side and which I'm now wondering if I'm feeling on the left side.
There's the sleep patterns - I was waking up between 3am and 4:30am and then having trouble getting back to sleep for a while. I've managed to extend it to 5:30am before I wake up, and then it's just a question of lying there for an hour before going to work.
And then, next week, we're back to the teeth again.
The 16 molar has sort of settled; like I said, the gum beneath the tooth feels slightly squishy. The 17 is the one that the endodontist is going to look at on Monday - the one with the chronic infection above it at the jaw. And I'm not looking forward to the needles and the numbness and the swelling and the 'settling' that has to happen - assuming the 17 molar can even be redone.
And I'm nervous. I'm nervous about the procedure, given how much trouble I've had. I'm nervous about the issues I'm having which have affected my activity and my mentality and made me feel awfully like a hypochondriac - like I'm starting at shadows all the time.
And I'm nervous about my writing.
I've been doing a lot of writing this month, but the big two that I really want to finish - a practical acquaintance with bees and Sokovia, Suburbia, and the Senate - are waiting for Civil War, just to see where the characterisation/story goes. Both are very much going to be jossed, but a practical acquaintance should be okay, because it was never going to stick to the score after Cap2 anyway. Mostly I want more Bucky characterisation for that, which Civil War should give us as The Winter Soldier didn't.
Sokovia, Suburbia, et. al is a different kettle of fish, mostly because it's a Civil War aftermath fic that doesn't follow the movies. And that confuses people a great deal, particularly after movies come out and are not what people predicted they'd be.
Plus, I was having trouble with the next section anyway (rewrote it about 5 times, summarised it, detailed it, deleted it again, rewrote it another 5 times, and Steve is still not playing ball with the story). I think I'm going to have to recalibrate that section entirely, start somewhere else, and introduce the next set of characters, backstorying the parts that I was trying to write. Ugh.
But all this depends on me having the energy/inspiration to actually write.
Let's not even go near the subject of profic and my upcoming 40th birthday. I haven't written any profic in a couple of years - too much second-guessing myself.
Speaking of my 40th; I need to have a word with the parentals about the party they want to throw me when I get back from overseas...
no subject
Hope you feel better, or at the least that nothing deteriorates worse.
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When the canon dries up on character and pairing, so does the fandom.
And thank you! I hope so too! (So tired of all this.)
no subject
I hope you feel better too -- dental stuff is so exhausting.
no subject