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Astonishing Persistence Of Memory - Past Time
The original concept was a full story in three parts, with Past Time being the first part. The story of Past Time can be summarised as, 'John returns to Atlantis and finds himself.' The sequels (Present Tense and Future Indefinite) were intended to deal with what happened to him in captivity by Kolya and the Wraith, and how his team-mates and Atlantis work with him and the lingering trauma of what was done to him as the IOC look over their shoulders.
The questions were put forward by
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renisanz, chyti and azure_horizon - thanks, girls!How did you come up with Ivali's character (and her name)? It seems like you would have felt the need to create her because John needed some kind of support apart from his team when he was trying to find himself. So, did Ivali change much from how you originally imagined her, and if so, how much?
There was always an Ivali-character in the story. As Yan, John needed a character who was wholly sympathetic to his displacement. A lover provided a connection with Yan's present that he couldn't sever - at least, not until he regained who he was in its entirety. And even then there was the issue to address of Ivali and her departure from Atlantis.
One of the other aspects that Ivali was meant to bring out was the 'softer' side of John - the side that we extrapolate is there based on our understanding of the character, but which we don't get to see because of his hang-ups and issues. John's not emotionally whole at any point during his time in Atlantis. His history, his failures, his guilt, his past are millstones around his neck. As Yan, however, without his history to define who he used to be, he's free to be someone else - someone who's still John Sheppard, but without the failure, the guilt, and the past.
I wanted the tragedy of regaining John to be the loss of Yan - exemplified in the goodbye scene between him and Ivali.
Ultimately, Ivali didn't really change much from concept to actualisation of the story. I would have liked to develop a little more of the relationship between her and Yan during her time in Atlantis, but time constraints prevented it.
The UST between John & Teyla - was this always meant to be unresolved, or did you decide upon it over the course of writing the story?
It was always meant to be unresolved at the end of Past Time. While the overall plot of Astonishing Persistence Of Memory featured a John/Teyla relationship, nothing was ever going to happen in Past Time.
By the end of Past Time, John's regained his memory and his sense of self, and in the finding of that, lost one of the mainstays of his time as Yan: Ivali Weaverkin. My take on Ivali is that she meant something to Yan, and therefore to John. At the end of this section of the story, he's not ready to start a relationship with Teyla, and Teyla's not prepared to start a relationship with him - for that reason and others.
I really did want to write the story with a John/Teyla resolution; but in the context of the storyline and everything that had gone before, it simply didn't fit and I wasn't willing to shoehorn it in.
Did you always plan to have the scene in the beginning with John in the tava bean field (remembering Teyla's face) in the story? If not, how did you develop it?
Yan and the tava field memory were always in the plan; I wanted something that would give a clear indication of who Yan used to be - until that point, it's implied that Yan is John, but never directly shown. The tava field flashback was intended to show us John - an earlier John looking at an earlier tava field, and the trigger was the scent of tava rising up from the plains below the village.
Did you always intend that scene where John remembers the kiss and tells Teyla he remembers how she tasted?
Again, yes, this scene was always in the plan, too. There was always the need for a moment in which the UST would peak; when the characters would balance on the edge with the choice to step back or plunge over. This time, they stepped back.
Ultimately, the memory of the tava field and the memory of the kiss are the two 'extremes' of the John/Teyla dynamic as I see it: allies at one end, lovers (or would-be lovers) at the other. So they're fitting 'bookends' for the uncertain period during which Yan is regaining his memory, but before John actually remembers who he was.
And I find it rather funny that two separate people asked the same question about each scene.!
Is the emergence of Yan John's way of living a life with no responsibilities? Is it what he desires most?
My personal feeling on Yan is that he's someone that John would like to be. That isn't meant in the sense of having no responsibilities, because Yan certainly has responsibilities among the Orawi, but in the sense that Yan doesn't feel the weight of John's history and memory - the things that have hardened and embittered John along the way of life.
If you think about it, John's been through a lot of terrible things in his experiences: estrangement from his father and brother, the stress of being a pilot in combat situations, his divorce with Nancy, being punished for doing what he felt was 'the right thing' even when it went against orders, solitude and isolation in Antarctica...
I don't imagine John ever got to 'escape' these memories, or what they did to him. He had to live with the pain and guilt and sorrow that was part of his history...until he 'blocked it off' from the Wraith.
What he desires most? Part of the difficulty in writing John-as-Yan was my wish to write John-as-Yan as missing something. Yan isn't whole as Yan. However, as John, he has to live with a heavier burden.
Would some aspects of Yan remain in John after he regains his memory?
Yes, aspects of Yan would remain in John. But they were already there in John before he lost his memory: he just wasn't capable of giving them free rein. After regaining his memory, I imagine that he balances between his old habits as John and feeling as though he wants to react as Yan.
Why did Jack come to Atlantis for John?
I wanted someone who could lay down John's military history, who understood where he was coming from, and who could sympathise with John's situation as Yan.
Back in S3 of Stargate SG1, Jack O'Neill got stuck on a planet with non-technological locals and developed a relationship with a local woman whom he left behind when his team finally got back to him. Jack's experience on Edora parallels with John-as-Yan living among the Orawi - that's part of Jack's momentary 'wistfulness' when he tells John that maybe it wouldn't have been so bad to leave him living among his community. It's one of the few times that we see Jack truly content, and so John's situation would have a strong resonance for Jack. He's been there, he knows what it's like.
Plus, Jack is always good at delivering a swift kick to the mikta.
Why did you decide to have the chair give John back his memories?
Several thought processes were involved in using the Ancient chair device. I wanted something that would provide an opportunity for people-saving dramatics. I wanted something that related to John's Ancient gene. And I wanted something that would be found on an outpost and useful for defending it. The chair was perfect.
The use of the chair was also significant in light of the sequel plots.
Does writing Teyla come easily to you? Or is it something you need to try hard at?
Teyla is almost always the easiest character for me to write.
Part of it's the combination of warrior and wisewoman, someone who's physically active, mentally acute (if not technically brilliant), and emotionally intuitive. Another of my favourite characters is Wonder Woman - another embodiment of the warrior-wisewoman type.
Part of it is the fact that Teyla's an 'oddball' - she's accepted by Atlantis but she's still not 'one of them', and she's somewhat separated from her people (as suggested by her lack of apparent steady interaction with them).
For me, the characters on the fringe are always more interesting: in their own ways the team is 'fringe' - that's what makes them appealing. But even in the team, Teyla is unique in that she's suspended between two worlds in a way that John, Ronon, and Rodney don't have to suffer - although that's because Ronon doesn't have a world to go back to: not even his own squadmates.
The difficult part for me is always to work out how to balance Teyla's sides with each other - to not pigeonhole her, and to write her in a way that might make people want to read more about her.
Why do you always have Teyla so closed off to Yan? Is she afraid that he will push the boundaries in a way John never would? If that's the case, why does she keep spending time with him?
I always see Teyla as a little closed off to John, more because she knows of the possibilities but isn't willing to explore them. However, she can still be reasonably open to him because she knows that John's own personal code of honour and his emotional state preclude him making a move and possibly being rejected. So, yes, John understood the lines that ran between him and Teyla. Yan doesn't.
To some extent, Teyla allows herself to forget that Yan isn't John for a little while - the weeks during which Yan is back from Ivali but without the memories of being John. Ultimately, however, she's reminded by the sparring session and the very immediate understanding that Yan's boundaries aren't as defined as John's - that he's more open, and with that openness comes the danger.
Did you mean for Ivali to be a mirror of Teyla? And if so, did you mean for her to... 'fail' in comparison? She couldn't integrate and she gave up on John in a way that Teyla never did.
Heh. Yes, I did intend for Ivali to be a mirror of Teyla. One thing that struck me about Nancy (John's ex-wife) was that she was worried for him in Outcast, but she didn't try to talk him out of what she suspected he was going to do. It makes sense to me that John would be most attracted to a 'type' of woman: Nancy, Teyla, and Ivali all being their own woman, caring about him, yet knowing that he's his own willful man and not trying to control him or boss him.
And, yes, Ivali is supposed to fail in comparison with Teyla. I don't know the precise term for it, but I think of it as a "shadow mirror" - something that you hold up either to show the faults and flaws in a subject, or which is intended to pale in comparison to the subject. In this case, Teyla is the subject, Ivali is the "shadow mirror". I tried to make her a character in her own right; tropes can be dangerous things if they take over one's characterisation.
What are some of the scenes that required major rewriting, as you mentioned in your journal posts about the progress of your story? Why did you have to rewrite them?
The scene that I rewrote the most was the 'opening' scene of the story, where Yan wakes up from his nightmare. I knew that the Athosians were going to arrive that day, but initially Yan was going to be one of the people who greeted them. Then I had trouble defining what his role among the Orawi was - John Sheppard as a farmer? I couldn't quite level that with John's body character - his physicality and energy - not long-term. I think I wrote and discarded about 10,000 words in the various attempts I made to start the story.
All the 'dream sequences' needed rewriting in the end - the ones which feature John in the prison with the Wraith. The initial dream sequence I wrote for the start of the story was actually from an original character's POV, which I decided didn't work in the end. The original character remained, but I changed the POV and the scenario. The 'dream sequences' were put in to show how John lost himself, and I wanted each successive part to show the degeneration of his memory and his sense of self, as well as roughly set up how he went from the end of Common Ground to the start of the story.
Generally, I rewrite scenes because they don't work for me, or because I need the action/story to go somewhere that isn't possible. Some scenes just leap out at you, others take time to get all the details right, like pieces of a puzzle. But getting them right is half the trick of writing - half the struggle and toil. And when I get them right, then there's a satisfaction for me at writing something that I can be proud of in a couple of weeks, a couple of months, a couple of years.
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Feel free to ask any other questions that strike you. It's always fun to discuss writing with other people!
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That's what I loved so much about Yan - the 'softer' side we get to see. I did see it as John Sheppard without all the baggage, and it was really interesting to see you explore that possibility of his character in your story.
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That's what I loved so much about Yan - the 'softer' side we get to see. I did see it as John Sheppard without all the baggage, and it was really interesting to see you explore that possibility of his character in your story.
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