Emotionally it is really really awful. REALLY awful. Like. Holy shit what the fuck awful.
And I think one of the ways in which racism hurts PoC, is that in our personal relationships with white people (professional, platonic, romantic, etc.) there is this quiet little niggling worry of "please don't reveal yourself to be someone who is OK saying/doing racist things." I always feel bad for having that worry, but honestly that worry isn't irrational. I've had far too many [former] friends reveal themselves to hold racist beliefs.
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And I think one of the ways in which racism hurts PoC, is that in our personal relationships with white people (professional, platonic, romantic, etc.) there is this quiet little niggling worry of "please don't reveal yourself to be someone who is OK saying/doing racist things." I always feel bad for having that worry, but honestly that worry isn't irrational. I've had far too many [former] friends reveal themselves to hold racist beliefs.