feelings (health again)

[tielan]

Periodontist referred me back to the dentist as having an abcess above the old root canal I had (next to the new root canal).

Dentist feels I need the old root canal redone, and has booked me in for the endodontist who is less certain that this is what's needed.

Endodontist consultation is scheduled for the same day that I'm consulting with the oral surgeon, just an hour earlier.

I'll wait to see what the oral surgeon says; I'm questioning whether they got all the nerve, whether there's something else happening there, whether it would just be easier to take it all out (assuming he can - the 2nd molar is pretty close to the sinus cavity, although the distinction is presently holding).

Ultimately, I am just le tired.

I want to have my mouth back. I don't want to feel my teeth throbbing, or my gums to feel swollen, or some nerve between my teeth to feel twitchy every now and then.

I want to be able to chew without wondering if something's going to give. If a nerve is going to tingle at me if I bite down on a nut - or a bone or something that's been toasted a little too long.

I don't want to have twinges at my temple or my jaw, or the back of my head - the twinges that remind me that my health is so tenuous.

I don't want to worry that it's going to spread from one tooth to two teeth to the upper jaw to the lower jaw to the TMJ and the head...

I want to sleep through the night again, and walk and run without having to be careful of my foot, and not have my right hand tire so fast or so easy.

I want, I want, I want...

Another friend of mine is also having teeth trouble; unfortunately for her, she's in the public system, while I have private health care. And the public system is cheaper, yes, but it's also a lot slower. And even on her disability pension and her husband's income, with two young sons, they can't afford everything at once. So she's painkillered up and dealing with it.

I'm lucky in so many ways; I know that intellectually. But right now, I just hate being stuck with my teeth and my issues.

Comments

[gaffsie]

There's something very anxiety-inducing about teeth trouble. Maybe it's a lizard-brain thing?

[tielan]

It's so close to the brain. And the mouth. And the eyes and ears and sinuses and some major major senses...

[heliopausa]

Sympathies. :(

[tielan]

Thanks!

[havocthecat]

I'm just glad that there is a public system for your friend. I'm sorry it's running too slow for her and she's just got to keep taking painkillers and deal with it.

I hope your consultations go well! I hope they can find a solution. It's never fun being stuck.

[tielan]

No, we're very glad of the public system and I think it's needed in any social welfare conscious society, but the other thing is that it's not like high level treatments are just handed out like chocolate eggs at easter. There's a queue and if you want to jump it, then you do end up paying more or at least a higher premium for insurance.

[havocthecat]

Part of my comment was jealousy. :) I want a public health system here! One that isn't just "go to the emergency room and everyone else soaks the cost." But I really am very glad that there's any kind of a public system for health care for your friend.

[everbright]

Teeth trouble is frankly terrifying any way you cut it, and you've got some of the most involved dental issues I've ever heard of. :(

[tielan]

*hugs*

It is getting really involved and I'm worried. The headaches aren't helping - or the reading up I've been doing and some of the horror stories you can't help but come across.

Plus, my health care professionals (the ones who aren't related to me) have been distressingly dismissive of my experiences/sensations. "It will be fine when you pay us more money to do this." Frankly, I'd rather get the tooth straight out than risk permanent damage to my brain/right-hand-side.

[everbright]

They ask that over here, esp. if you don't have insurance. "Do you want to save the tooth." I always thought it was morbid, but if it would save you this worry I'm all for it!

[beatrice_otter]

Wow. It's never good when you're caught in a moebius loop of referrals, which sounds like what's happening here.

[tielan]

And everyone's so intent on "maintaining".

'It'll go away.' 'I'm sure it's nothing.' 'Just take some painkillers.'

Honestly, if I'd taken the healthcare professionals' advice instead of pushing for the extra things, I'd probably be a lost worse off right now.