(no subject)

[tielan]

I don't know if I'm COVID depressed and therefore struggling to get things done, if I have executive dysfunction only on certain things, or if I'm just putting off stuff because I Can't Even.

I have a list of things to do; they're pretty easy things to get done. But they are just not getting done.

It's a very simple list:
[] juice oranges
[] juice lemons
[] juice limes
[] start making peel vinegar
[] cat tree
[] chicken post
[] gardening newsletter
[] pooh bear block


I can do plenty of other things. I have heaps of energy. If I decide to do something, then by golly, I do it. But actually going through a list? Makes it difficult.

This is my brain. Is this my brain on AHD? It might be, but if so I haven't been diagnosed. I can concentrate when there's a deadline or when I really want something done, but my brain does otherwise flit to and from projects.

So, for instance, in the two hours since typing up this post, I have decided to do 'the chicken post' and I am in full flow. But I have stared at that entry for a week and more, trying to get the nous up to do it and...no. I couldn't. Start typing tonight and I might very well finish it before the weekend.

I really don't get my brain.

Comments

[rmc28]

I've been learning about ADHD a lot over the last year or so, because one of my children almost certainly has it. It does seem to run in families, and while I mostly *don't* seem to fit the profile, I fit it a lot more when under stress. And well, *waves at current global situation*, I'm stressed a lot more than usual now, and so are most people.

[tielan]

Perhaps the other thing is, like autism, women learn how to mask it better because so much more is expected of us.

It's not that I'm not getting anything done. I just feel like I'm not getting the things I want to get done, done.

Or maybe it's all my thoughts on the treadmill churning my productivity into mush. Also a possibility.

[havocthecat]

If you're having a hard time getting projects done (and you're always complaining about that with books), maybe it's time to seek a professional diagnosis just in case? Is that easier in Australia? But whatever you do, you know I support you and I want the best for you.

Also I have never heard of peel vinegar, but I might start making that, that sounds AMAZING for cleaning, instead of the plain white vinegar I use. And I always have citrus around.

[tielan]

It might usually be easier in Australia, I guess I have to find out a bit more about it. Might ask a friend who got a diagnosis what she had to go through.

*hugs* Thank you.

Fement Your Own Vinegars - by one of my gardening friends.

[booksarelife]

Feel free to ignore this, but something I’ve learned often helps me is to figure out exactly what all the steps are for each of the things I need to do, and make sure I know how to do each step and if there’s anything I need that I would need to get/make/find/etc.. Sometimes this makes things seem more overwhelming, but usually it helps because now I know what specifically I need to, which is fairly often the problem, even if it didn’t seem like it was at first.

[tielan]

Would you believe the 'juicing lemons/limes/oranges' are the steps to 'making peel vinegar'?

I even got the juicer out and it sat on the bench for two nights before I did the citrus juicing...

But yes, some of those things have prerequisite steps and working those out is frustrating.

[booksarelife]

But it could also totally be just all the extra stress and everything-I know the pandemic has knocked down my motivation and focus as well

[jenab]

*hugs*

[tielan]

*hugs back*

[monanotlisa]

Brains: difficult customers, I swear.

[tielan]

If my brain was a customer I would ban it from the store. Unfortunately, it's the freaking store manager.

[monanotlisa]

:P

Sent from my iPhone

[grav_ity]

I've been having depression spikes for weeks. Mostly unpredictable, it took me a while to figure it out, because while my depression was spiking, my ANXIETY wasn't...so I was just very blank.

I've very much been in the fits and starts you're describing. My advice is to...go with it? Like, the down times are easier because I know that I've been doing stuff? It's complicated and brains are stupid. *hugs*

[tielan]

It's complicated and brains are stupid.

Oh so much. OH SO MUCH.

[deird1]

I can concentrate when there's a deadline or when I really want something done, but my brain does otherwise flit to and from projects.

FTR, and I'm not attempting to diagnose you, but not being able to concentrate except on things you find totally fascinating is a classic symptom of ADHD.